Against Me! is a 15-year-old punk rock band formed in Gainesville, Florida in 1997 by singer/songwriter Thomas James Gabel, who originally wanted to establish himself as a solo act with backing musicians. The band released their debut LP titled Against Me! in 2000 through Crasshole Records, which was followed by the widely distributed EP Crime as Forgiven by Against Me! in 2001 by Plan-It-X Records. Against Me! experienced breakthrough success with 2007’s New Wave and 2010’s White Crosses

Against Me! has established themselves as a howling, militant quartet with members such as drummer Jay Weinberg, who has played with Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band and is the son to the original E Street Band’s drummer and percussionist, Max Weinberg. Against Me! is radically political with anti-war statements and elements of economic and social injustice within their music. They have been praised by artists like Bruce Springsteen and groups such as Foo Fighters

My personal favorite was Against Me!’s White People for Peace. During the song’s music video, two fighting teams are placed on a football field and begin to brawl with cheerleaders celebrating the violence, while an overseeing politician encourages “war”. Probably the most important character is the “protester”, a deformed, weak man whose appearance conveys how America’s voice has been abused, neglected, and physically handicapped.

But a surprising truth about Against Me! is that the lead singer Gabel was a closeted transgender his entire life. He publicly came out in May of 2012 to Rolling Stone. Thomas James Gabel, who has now changed her name to Laura Jane Grace, is the first to reveal her gender orientation in such a bold and vocal fashion within her genre of music.

Grace revealed that she had suffered with gender dysphoria from as early as she can remember in her life. When she was about four or five years old, she observed Madonna and began fantasizing about being a character of similar powerful female artist. Furthermore, while her mother was away, Grace experimented with her mother’s collection of cosmetics.

Grace grew up in a traditional, broken home. Her father, Major Thomas Gabel, a graduate of West Point Academy and a twenty-year in army veteran, never accepted her as a son, or at the very least, a person. Her father once observed Grace playing with Barbie dolls and strongly disapproved of this action. “Okay, I’m obviously doing something that’s not okay in my Dad’s eyes,” Grace said. The family moved from military base to military base, making it difficult for Grace to attain solid friendships with other children. Eventually, her parents divorced when she was eleven-years-old. The specific reason as to why the parents divorced was never revealed to Grace.

As a teenager, Grace never had many friends and was ridiculed at school, often being called a “faggot”. Only at thirteen-years-old did she begin to try hard drugs, such as cocaine and acid, rather than the typical alcohol and pot to numb the emotional pain.

At first glance, Grace is a rather masculine-looking character despite her internal feminine quality. She is tall at six-foot-four-inches and has a skinny body that is covered with artistic tattoos and piercings. She described herself singing as an “angry white man in a punk band”.

Playing with the band, she felt alienated as if she had to put on an act for her fellow musicians and friends. “It was a detachment from your body and yourself,” Grace said in an interview with Rolling Stone discussing gender dysphoria.

There was a “private shame” about her life, Grace recalled. Grace couldn’t bear looking into the mirror and seeing the reflection of her male appearance. She reverted to cross dressing to appease this, but this solution didn’t satisfy her. When she was young, she would even pray to God, asking to wake up in a female body the next morning. At one point, she even prayed to the Devil, promising to spend the rest of her life as a serial killer if she magically turned into a woman.

Grace struggled to have the courage to be herself, until she met a fan at one of her shows who said that Grace’s lyrics were an inspiration to her own struggles with gender dysphoria. A particular example of the transgender Grace speaking through her lyrics can be heard in Against Me!’s “Ocean” from the New Wave

If I could have chosen I would have been born a woman / My mother once told me she would have named me Laura / I would grow up to be strong and beautiful like her / One day I’d find an honest man to make my husband

At 25, Grace met her future wife Heather Hannoura, who designed merchandise for music groups such as My Chemical Romance and Green Day. They finally married and had a daughter, whom they named Evelyn. Grace tried to suppress her gender dysphoria for the sake of the marriage, thinking her wife wouldn’t want to be married to a woman. At some point, Grace couldn’t keep her emotions chained inside any longer and revealed the truth to his wife. Hannoura replied to Grace, saying that “of all things you could have told me, that is the least worst.” The only thing that bothered Hannoura was the fact that Grace thought she couldn’t trust her own wife with this information, fearing that she would be judged.

Similarly, when Grace opened up to her mother, there was nothing but hugging, warmth and compassion. The once Thomas James Gabel adopted the name Laura Jane Grace. “Laura” being the name her mother would have given her if she was originally born as a girl. “Grace” was her mother’s maiden name, and “Jane” was chosen simply because it sounded pretty.

Grace hasn’t spoken to her father since she revealed the truth to him. “The relationship was what it was. It wasn’t like it was great to begin with. It’s his loss really. If he comes around he comes around, and I’ll still be his kid. But I can’t live my life like that,” Grace said in an interview, admitting that she has struggled, and is now working on her own personal forgiveness and acceptance.

There is a long process of gender transitioning for Grace. Every day is a new challenge and a step further. If hormone therapy proves to be unsuccessful, she will consider breast implants. In the future, she will be having multiple female body constructions surgeries. She will also be removing all of her tattoos that have overtones of suggestive male testosterone quality. Grace also has plans to publish an autobiography.

Grace has said that she doesn’t exactly want to be the iconic spokesperson for all transexual people. Instead, she just wants everyone to be accepting and fair of her new lifestyle.

Not all transgender people have received the outpouring support Grace has had in being transgender. According to Injustice at Every Turn: A Report of the National Discrimination Survey, a study to observe the amount of discrimination that transgender and gender nonconforming people receive, an unsettling “41% of respondents reported attempting suicide compared to 1.6% of the general population”. Grace admits that she is part of that statistic. For a lot of individuals, they’re not as fortunate as Grace in being accepted by the public. Instead, they are tormented, injured or even killed by people with conflicting ideologies.

However, Grace is now an example of a brave spoken courage that most people of the LGBT movement are beginning to tap into–no longer fearing the potential discrimination and hate they experience from an insensitive crowd.

As for her band, all the members were shocked at first when Grace told them the news, thinking it was an artistic and practical joke. After a few awkward hugs and settling of information, her fellow bandmates went on treating Grace exactly the same way they had before. Against Me! is still on tour playing shows just as crazy and wild as ever with the release of their new album Transgender Dysphoria Blues. The only difference is that their lead singer has long hair past her shoulders, wears makeup and sometimes wears high-heels.